Thoughts

So right now in my life I am processing things a bit more. With my job being part time, and with it being in the evening, I have plenty of time to myself. For the past 6 months or so I have had plenty of time to read, clean, dream, organize, journal and just...think. And though at times I complain about being lonely or bored during the day, I am realizing that this time has been almost necessary for my sanity. I realize that God hasn't been punishing me, but more or less forcing me to face my fear of being by myself. Granted, being lonely down here has been a frequent feeling of mine- leaving all friends and family for a new place isn't easy. Finding friends hasn't been a huge struggle but getting past that point of shallow friendship has. I'm a person who thrives on truely fellowshipping with another person. Getting to know someone deeply...and being known by another. At the same time I find that David and I are becoming greater friends. Yes, we've been friends for awhile now but not deeply friends. But in the absence of girlfriends David and I have grown that friendship. I've heard somewhere that love is "friendship on fire," and I can truely relate to this. He's funny...I mean really funny in the sense that its weird, quirky and original. He's a great listener and problem solver. These are roles I think I usually went to my mom or Heidi for, but now I turn to David. I relish our time together in the evenings, laughing at each other. And I think being away from friends and family has cemented this in our hearts. This time together is to be always cherished. But again, beyond David's friendship I don't have the true friends I once had. But God has shown me the beauty in stillness, in contentment with yourself- beyond what your doing or who your with. He has provided a friendship as well, through his Word, Christian literature, through the beauty here in Florida. At this time in life I am going through many trasitions- possibly a new job, starting a class in the Fall, starting a ministry at the church and I just want to chronicle God's faithfulness. His enduring frienship for those who ask for it!